Really though.....it's hard and hard work. So now I have decided to not struggle so hard with it all. It WILL all work out one way or another so why must I always let myself become frustrated or upset? I do believe that it is my own illusion of control that causes this. I need to let go of my desire to have a certain outcome and just go with the flow! This is a lesson that seems to be repeating in my life often. So I am ready to give, to wave the white flag......to surrender to what this is supposed to be about. It doesn't mean I will stop my planning and listening and learning, it just means that I am going to roll with the punches and do it in such a way as to say....yes....that's what I meant to do all along!